I am so excited. If you’ve never seen or even heard of Little Britain before, I would suggest you look it up.

I had the pleasure of meeting Lauryn from the latest installment of A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila on Saturday night over at The L Bar in Sayreville. Incidentally, I didn’t approach her; she plopped herself down at my table and said, “I’m hiding from my ex,” in kind of a stage whisper.

Those of us at the table immediately started saying things like “you look really familiar” until she finally admitted to having been on the show.

She seemed cool enough; we were in the basement of the club, which is pretty loud, and honestly she seemed a little embarrassed that we had all watched the show. Turns out her opinion of Tila is pretty much the same as mine, and I’ll leave it at that.

I still haven’t managed to run into Jay - aka “JERSEY!,” aka one of the most hilarious characters - but then again, I’m not so sure we frequent the same places, him being a straight, hard-drinkin’, good ol’ boy from north Jersey after all. Honestly, I just want to hear him say “JERSEY!” in real life anyway.

Poor Sirbrina Guerrero. First Tila nixes her from the altogether entertaining A Shot at Love II on MTV, and now she’s getting attacked at a Seattle Mariners game.

ABC News reported last week that Sirbrina and her ladyfriend were reprimanded by stadium officials after they “exchang[ed] pecks” in the stands and a mother attending the game with her young son complained. According to Safeco Field, “staff will proactively intervene to support an environment where guests can enjoy the Safeco Field experience free from unacceptable behavior, including … displays of affection not appropriate in a family setting.”

Funny how no one says anything when straight people participate in PDA.

The article said, “Washington passed a law in 2006 that specifically bans discrimination of same-sex couples in any public setting,” but I’m not seeing that in place here if a bit of ‘affectionate kissing’ leads to an ultimatum: stop kissing or leave the park.

It’s become tradition that, whenever I make an appearance down in Virginia, my dad and I watch the latest episode of Real Time with Bill Maher together. Maher’s sarcasm and wit with regard to political commentary are spot on, and the following excerpt from one of his most recent episodes is no exception.

This is in reference to Barack Obama’s comment about working class voters, in which he said, “It’s not surprising, then, they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or anti-pathy to people who aren’t like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations.”

And Maher’s response?

“And finally, New Rule: Referring to voters who America has left behind economically as ‘bitter’ isn’t an insult. In fact, it’s a compliment, acknowledging that they’re smart enough to understand what’s happening to them. The hopeful, now those are some idiots.

So, let’s separate the bitter - my people - from the idiots. If you think the Democrats are going to take away your Bible, you’re an idiot. If you think they’re going to take away your gun, you’re an armed idiot. And if you think they’re going to take away your gun and give it to a Mexican to kill your God, you’re Bill O’Reilly.

Now, at the end of last week when Barack Obama ignited the ‘bitter-gate’ scandal, you would have thought that he had scaled Mount Rushmore, dick-slapped Jefferson in the face, and spray painted ‘God damn America’ over Lincoln. But he wasn’t lying. The truth is that religion and guns and hating gays and immigrants are crutches that people lean on. So are fast-food, crystal meth and child beauty pageants, but we don’t have time to tackle all of America’s addictions in one night.

So, let’s focus on the big thing. That the people who claim to be the ‘non-elitists,’ are the ones who constantly shift tax burdens from the people who fire you, to you. John McCain voted to repeal the estate tax, voted against raising the minimum wage, has no health care plan, and is fine with keeping the working class in Iraq for a hundred years. But, he’s a real ‘man of the people.’

And the president went to Harvard and Yale, and inherited your country from his dad. But he’s not an elitist because he can neither read nor write.

What does it take to label someone ‘elitist’ these days anyway? They wear shoes? They don’t buy their groceries at the gas station? Their dog has a name and their truck doesn’t?!

You know who is bitter in America? I am. Because shit-kickers voted twice for a retarded guy they wanted to have a beer with, and everybody else had to suffer the consequences!”

The Brits have come and gone. Our launch at work has come and gone. And it’s taking a lot out of me to get back into the mindset of a ‘normal’ day here in Dirty Jersey.

It was fantastic seeing Becks, Ness, and Neil last week. The first night they were here, we did the standard “I’m jet-lagged and not really up for anything” activity of ordering take-out and watching American Idol. The next night was really the polar opposite. We headed down to Harrah’s in Atlantic City - and may I say that I’m really getting spoiled by free hotel rooms - and spent seven hours, from 10PM to 5AM, playing slot machines. I didn’t think that was possible, that the slots would get really boring, but honestly, with hilarious friends, lots of free alcohol, and a new paycheck burning a hole in your pocket, it’s extremely consuming. I was a wee bit concerned at first when I lost a quick two hundred bucks, but by the end of the night I’d come out about $20 ahead, and breaking even is just as good as winning. Good times.

The Brits spent the weekend in the City, but unfortunately due to the launch at work I was actually stuck at the office all day on Saturday, and felt well exhausted for two days afterwards, so that didn’t happen. They came back on Tuesday and we spent the evening watching a horrendously bad horror film called Rest Stop while munching on pizza and buffalo wings from Pizza Hut, because that was the only thing open past 10pm on a weeknight, apparently. We spent all the next day shopping at Jackson Premium Outlets and then eating at a fabulous New Orleans-style restaurant in New Brunswick called The Old Bay, which serves massive, amazing dishes like blue crap and spinach dip, seafood and sausage gumbo, crawfish etouffee, and seafood jambalaya. Highly recommended if you’re ever in the area, hungry, and willing to spend about 30-40 bucks per person with drinks.

All told, it was a great visit, and it makes me wish London were just a wee bit closer than it is.